Amanda Star is back in action... well, blogging :)

    "Back in action", makes me sound like I am a super hero!  LOL Trust me - no super hero here. Just a mom with a blog! So much has happened since my blog was accidentally deleted last year. After I got over the initial shock and then sadness I decided to redesign and relaunch. My first post is just a little snap shot of what to expect from ASP.  I am not photographing as much, only when I want and how I want, which is super fun by the way. I get to be creative and artsy and photograph for people that I love.  Things have been so crazy ya'll.  One of the  biggest changes has been essential oils, which you will be seeing and hearing a lot of here on my blog.  They have totally changed our lives and in the craziest way!  I have always thought people who liked and used oils were hippies and honestly, a little nuts. Turns out they aren't either - (well, sometimes they are hippies and yes, I have met a few crazies) but, they are just people like you and me that have found something that works for their family.  Something that doesn't have a billion side effects, something that actually makes your life just a little easier.  I get to share our story with you and I hope it inspires you!   

    Then there is our adoption.  Man, when we started in 2016 we knew it was going to be hard, we knew it was going to break our hearts into a billion pieces and then put us back together even better than before.  We have had three matches this year that all failed. Well, it is weird to say failed. Can you say that when a birth mom decided she simply cannot place her baby for adoption is a fail?  He/she is her child and I can't blame her a bit.  Our first match almost broke us.  The birth mom ultimately made the decision to let her baby go into the state system. That is a fail, that I cannot fathom.  Watching your kids break, watching them put their heart and soul into adoption and then to have it fall to pieces in front of you is insanely hard.  We made the decision early on that we would include our children in our journey, that we would not hide anything from them.  I don't regret that, but I wish I could take a little of their pain away.  I wish I could make it better.  As we share our story, I hope that it will inspire someone to put their hearts on the line for a child. That even though it is really hard and really scary - you can still do it. People tell us we are strong, that we are brave. I don't think we are. If anything, I think we are broken and weak.  But God!  Through this whole journey, through every move, every decision, we have felt God walk us through this. I have watched as my kids went from broken to whole because of His love and His strength. Isn't that amazing, as young as my kids are, they get to see God's love and that in all things, He is good.  

    I look forward to sharing our story here and some of my new work as we build our new blog!  

                                                                                        Dream Big, Live Big

                                                                                                Amanda Star